You know the drill: late night creeping in the dark, tiptoeing in closets, close ear to door ratios, email/social media hacking. Sound familiar? These descriptions fit the consistent and occasional snooper. Curiosity always kills the cat in the name of doubt. What exactly are you looking for? How much more respectable would it be to firmly ask questions about suspicions you have about your partner’s actions?
Every individual deserves a portion of privacy. We have gone as far as having passcodes, dark screen protectors, physical locks and even turning down phone volumes foe the sake of privacy. To the insecure, it may seem as if you are hiding something, but to the wise it’s clear that it’s rightfully owned. It’s natural to want your partner to share things with you, but it’s disrespectful to overstep the boundary. When you start searching, you probably will find something. However, what you may find may be innocent and not a deal-breaker, but because you’ve already went in with a mindset of finding something harmful, it will instantaneously trigger jealousy and anger.
Small intimacies that may be written in your partner’s diary/journal/email may be shared with you once your relationship reaches that level of love; but how will it ever get to that level if you are initially hasty, nosey and disbelieving? Twisting your insecurities into your partner’s flaws immediately forecast your weaknesses. Trust and communication hold hands to provide a sturdy foundation to build upon. Even if you are dealing with a reformed cheater, snooping isn’t justified, as you’ve made a decision to forgive and move forward. Snooping only digs up the past, throwing a wrench in your future. Yes, the unknown is frightening, especially if there are ghosts of past relationships, but this is where faith and trust in your partner break through. If your intuition is whispering to your soul, that’s not a green light to play private eye investigator, it’s a sign to have a conversation with your partner about his/her inconsistences and form your decision from there.
Have you snooped around? What good or bad has occurred from it?